Her majesty the Quoon was visiting a hospital in Edinburgh.
She approached one old chap in the wards, and said “How are you today my good man?”
“Ach” he replied. “Ma twin misfortunes – Barren land and fertile women!.
“He must be in for a vasectomy” mused the Quoon. She moved on down the ward. “How are you today?” She asked another chap.
“Och! I backward cast my e’e.
On prospects drear!
An’ forward, tho’ I canna see,
I guess an’ fear! ” he said.
“He must be depressed” she thought to herself.
She walked over to a third man, sitting up in bed. “And how are you?”
The old man stared at her for a moment.
Then he said “How fair art thou, my bonnie lass! So deep in love am I! And I will love thee still, my dear, till all the seas gang dry.”
The Quoon was taken aback. “Is this the mental ward?” she asked the superintendent.
“No ma’am” he said.
“It’s the Burns ward”.
(c) 2008 Me.